Twinkles and more: Parenting

Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts

When I'd first had the twins, I remember someone saying to me that she could always spot parents with three or more kids as they were more laid back than those who had one or two children. I didn't really get it at the time, but it's something that has always stuck with me and I think she might be right (she was a mum of three, so she had a good insight). Not because we are naturally laid back, but because we simply have to be in order to survive being outnumbered!!

I'm actually a natural worrier and perfectionist, but this doesn't doesn't work well with three children!

When you have one or two children you can spend time selecting clothes to ensure they're all co-ordinated - with three it just takes too long! As for matching socks, well finding one pair in our house is mission impossible, never mind three! My Mum thinks this is a crime against humanity, me on the other hand - well as long as they actually have socks on then I'm happy!

Keeping the house tidy and keeping on top of washing is also a challenge! I've learnt that storage for toys is key, so that you can just fling stuff in - out of sight out of mind! I'm lucky to have a supersized washer and dryer to handle the washing, but sometimes our clothes might be slightly crumpled as I refuse to waste my precious evenings ironing!!

With three young children, life almost becomes about survival! Yes, they play on ipads more than I'd like, we bribe them with sweets and I don't always leave the house armed with snacks and toys to keep them amused whilst we're out (sometimes just getting out is an achievement). We also rarely take out beakers or changes of clothes in case of accidents - nowadays there is always somewhere you can pick up stuff if you really need it! However, we are strict on the things that matter to us - manners, bedtime and being kind to others.

As a result we are more laid back, simply because we have to be otherwise we'd completely stressed, which wouldn't be good. I also think it's important to pick your 'battles' wisely, so focusing on what's important for us rather than 'pefection'!

I definitely think being more laid back has it's positives. We travel a lot and being more laid back certainly helps with that. I know people who won't leave the country with their kids due to fear of how they might react on the flight! Yes, they might scream for a bit, but in a few hours you'll be somewhere lovely and it will all be worth it!

It also means that we spend lots of quality time with our children as we're not spending our time ironing or rearranging the playroom!

Don't get me wrong there are days when we are completely stressed, but that tends to be because the children aren't following instructions, which is a big issue for us at the minute, rather than because of something such as one of them getting a bit messy!

This parenting journey is quite a personal one and what works for one family doesn't work for others. We view our role as parents to be helping our children to become the best person that they can be and I don't think matching socks plays much of a role in helping us to achieve that!

Do you have three or more? What are your survival tips?!

J xx

If you're a regular reader of my blog, you'll know that at the end of every month I normally do a post about what we've been up to that month - a bit of a round up really. However, with my recent marathon training and the generally business of life with three kids, I haven't managed to do on since January!

Rather than do a post for each month I've missed, I thought I'd do a bit of a roundup post as a bit of a catch up. My memory is rubbish since having the kids, so I'm not sure I'll remember everything, but I'm sure I'll be able to capture the important bits!

February

At the beginning of Feb we had the twins third birthday. I can't actually believe that they are three already. Their birthday fell mid-week, so Simon and I both had the day off work and took them to Conkers, which they enjoyed. Once we'd collected Oscar from school we went to our local Indian restaurant, which they love. The following weekend, they had a little party at one of our local play centres, which they loved.

Also in February we went to Norfolk during half term week and stayed in a gorgeous cottage. I'm planing on doing a post about where we stayed, so keep your eyes peeled for that one.

March

March mainly consisted of lots marathon training and eating well, so was pretty quiet.

We had Easter towards the end of March, so we had the twin's Easter Bonnet Parade at pre school, which was super cute.

On Easter Sunday we went to a family fun day at Nottingham Forest, our local football team, which was good fun. Heidi particularly liked the face painting!

April

April was London Marathon month, so was mostly spent preparing myself mentally and physically. I've captured my marathon experience on my blog, so you can read Part One and Part Two if you want to see how I got on.

May

In May I felt like I got my life back! No more turning down social occasions because of training and it meant I could drink again - hurray!

At the beginning of May we went to Ascot for the day with my Mum and Dad, which was brilliant. We stayed overnight at the Hilton, Bracknell, which is perfect if you're attending Ascot.

During the middle of the month we attended a Christening, which was a lovely day.

I also attending my first blogging conference, the Tots 100 Blogcamp, which was great. You can read all about it here.

Holiday shopping was also quite prominent in May, in preparation for our holiday to Dubai, which was at the end of May. I've written a full post about how we got on, which you can read here.

So there you have it a quick update of what we've been up to the past few months. I can't believe how fast this year is going!

Now that the marathon is over, I hope to resume doing the monthly round up, so keep a look out for June's update at the beginning of July.

J x

It's been a while since I've linked up to this link-up, but It's one of my favourite ones, so I'm really going to try and link up more often. The link-up is ran by the lovely Heledd over at Running in Lavender and it's a great way to capture a moment every week.

My Captured Moment is from last week. Henry had started potty training (finally!) and his reward for doing so well was a sleepover in Oscar's room. Obviously Heidi being Heidi, there is no way she wasn't joining the fun, so they all slept in Oscar's bed together.

Thankfully it was too mad, we had about half an hour of giggling and silly antics, but once they'd got it out of their system they all went to sleep and stayed in bed until the next morning.

I captured this pic, just as we were heading to bed.

J xx

My captured moment is from a couple of weeks back when Oscar turned 6. He had his birthday party at Pizza Express, which was brilliant.

What struck me with these photos is how grown up he looks. It made me realise that he's no longer a little baby boy anymore. He's starting to grow up!

Now I know he's only 6, but I think all parents experience this realisation at various points along the parenting journey. Those moments when you realise that your children are getting older and are growing up.

The photo, and him turning 6, made me realise that my first baby boy is no longer a 'little boy', he's actually now a 'boy'. He is becoming so much more independent. He's starting to read and write, he helps himself to squash, he can warm things up in the microwave, can dress himself and on a good day he'll even attempt to make his own bed.

As emotional this realisation was, when I put him to bed that night we had a lovely snuggle as we always do and I realised that he'll always be my little baby!

Everyone says that time goes fast and it really does. I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday and now he's 6! There really is nothing like the journey of parenting to make time fly!

J xx

There's been so many special moments to choose from this week as all the children have been involved in nativity plays, which I'll share photo's from in a separate post. However, the moment I've chosen is the twin's first night in big boy/girl beds.

We've been putting off changing their cotbeds from cots to beds for a while. This was mainly due to worrying about the chaos it might cause at bedtime, but it was probably also a little bit of me not wanting to admit that they are no longer babies and that's it for us - no more cots in our house! I'm completely fine with this, we only ever planned to have two children, although life never works out the way you plan. It's still a little bit sad when you realise that the baby days are over.

So, moving on from the sentimental element, how has the transition been..?

Well it's actually been pretty easy going. In fact, if I'd known just how easy we probably wouldn't done it a few months ago.

The first couple of nights, we'd go to bed and find Henry asleep on the floor, but that seems to have stopped now. They are both are so proud of their new big boy/girl beds.

Here are the photo's we took on the first night to capture the moment.

Sleep tight my little babies!

J xx

It's been a while since I've linked up to the My Captured Moment linky, which is hosted by the lovely Heledd from Running in Lavender. It's a lovely linky and I'd like to try and do it more often as it's a lovely way to appreciate special little moments.

This week I came across this photo. My Brother recently got married and this photo of me and Henry was taken during the service, right before Henry decided to start shouting and being silly, meaning that I had to take him out of the room! He looks so adorable in this photo and I just love how amazing and blue his eyes look.

J xx

When the twins were still tiny, we worked hard to ensure that they were in a good, predictable routine (I think it's the only way to survive twins!). As a result they've always been good sleepers. They go to bed at 7pm and sleep until about 6/6.30am. They've also always had a couple of hours in the day, generally around lunchtime, even if we were out and about they would have a decent nap in their buggy.

As most parents of toddlers will know, this daytime nap is essential for keeping everyone sane! It gives exhausted parents a bit of a breather, a chance to have a coffee and restore the house to some sort of order (which is often destroyed five minutes after said child or children wake up!). And it ensures that tantrums are reduced (well sometimes) during the afternoon. The daytime nap is even more vital when you've got twins!

A couple of weeks ago it became clear that the daytime nap was no longer to be! You can imagine my dismay at this. We'd put the twins to bed at 7pm as usual. Only they decided that they 10pm was actually a more sensible time for sleeping. Not great!

As much as I love the couple of hours peace that the daytime nap brings, evenings are sacred! I work part-time, so evenings are often spent cooking, catching up on house work and having some quality time with Simon. So, it was decided that from that day on the daytime nap had to go (sob)!

Since then, we've had no issues at bedtime and it's actually not been too bad. They occasionally nod off in the car or buggy, but as long as they don't have any longer than 20 mins, we're safe! One of the positives is that it gives us more freedom to go out in the day. We found that we'd often work around the nap, but we no longer have to worry about that anymore.

We occasionally have the odd day (today being one of them) where they wake early (5.30am) and then are absolute monsters come 5pm! I've spent the last couple of hours dealing with silly tantrums and trying everything to ensure they stay awake until bedtime (not fun)!

So, as much as I dreaded the arrival of the day when the daytime nap was no more, it hasn't been quite as bad as anticipated!

J xx

On Friday Heidi began her potty training journey.

A week ago I bought a pack of Huggies Pull Ups as they were on offer. Heidi really took to them and has been showing a real interest in the potty, so on Friday I decided to take the plunge and let her wear big girl pants.

Armed with two pairs of spare pants, a change of leggings and a potty we headed out to pick up Oscar's school uniform and for a spot of lunch with my Mum.

I'm delighted to report that there were no accidents! We went to toilet and few times and my little girl was amazing. I can't believe how easy she's taking to it. With Oscar it seemed to take ages, although I think we rushed him a little as I was expecting the twins.

I put pull ups on for her afternoon nap, which she wasn't happy about. When she woke up she kept asking for me to put her nappy on. I suspected she needed a poo and tried to get her to go on the potty but she wouldn't! I put her nappy on and sure enough it was as I'd suspected..!

She's been amazing all weekend and only had one accident this afternoon. She's still struggling with the pooing though, but it's early days.

I can't complain as she's done so well this weekend. The plan is to continue with the 'big girl' pants in the day and use pull ups for naps and bedtimes.

I can't believe my little girl is turning into a big girl, sometimes I actually forget that she's two as she seems so grown up and feisty!

Henry on the other hand isn't really interest. I actually think doing them separately will be easier, so we'll just wait until he's ready...

I'll keep you updated.
J xx

Since I got pregnant, with Oscar, in May 2009, I've done so much worrying about him. At first I worried about something going wrong with the pregnancy. At our 20 week scan, we were told that his kidneys were dilated, so until the next scan I worried about that (he was fine). Then I worried about something happening in the run up to the birth (what if I slip in the ice or fall down the stairs?!). Then I worried during the actual birth (which was very stressful).

When Oscar was born I then worried about SIDS and something happening to him. When we were weaning I worried about him choking, the list goes on...

Three years after having Oscar I had our twins, again a whole load of worry during pregnancy and beyond...

Recently, I seem to be hearing lots of horrible stories involving things happening to children. It seems like every week there is a story about some freak accident, a child going missing, or you hear of a horrid story of something that's happened to a friend of a friend's child. And it makes me worry. A LOT!

I seem to be worrying much more recently. We are so lucky that all of our three children are healthy, but what if this doesn't continue...? Surely having three, means that the chance of something happening to one of them is higher...? I think we probably all have this thought at some point, but we have to bury it away, or I don't think we'd ever leave the house.

I've always worried when any of my three go in someone else's car or stay overnight somewhere. My brain goes through all the things that could possibly happen (I have a very active imagination) and then I push the horrible dark thoughts away and try and get on with something else.

I'm hoping I'm not the only one who does this? I wonder if this (often) irrational fear and worry about something happening to our children ever goes away, or whether it's something that mother nature has installed in us to protect our offspring?

I'd love to hear your thoughts?

I appreciate this is a bit of a random post, but is something I just needed to get off my chest!!

J xx

May has been a month of ups and downs.

It began really well with a bank holiday and a trip to visit our friend's. We had a lovely overnight stay with them and it was lovely to spend time with their new baby. The children were really well behaved, which is always a bonus. It also meant we could get a photo of us all, which is a rarity.

However, on our way home from our lovely stay we realised that Oscar's beloved Bunny was missing. Unfortunately he's still not been found, but Oscar has a new Bunny, which he seems to have taken ok to. You can read more about this sad story in my Losing Bunny post.

During May, Simon and I had a trip to Ascot races with my Mum and Dad, which was fab. I love to get glammed up and a trip to the races provides the perfect excuse!

This month I also got my phone stolen, whilst in London for work. It was stolen straight out of my hand by two idiots on a motorbike. I had to wait over a week for a replacement, which was pretty awful. I felt so disconnected from what has happening in the world and I hated not having a camera on me at all times!

We've also had a couple of weeks where the twins have been infected with a sickness bug. Heidi had it for a few days first and then about four days later Henry came down with it. Luckily Simon, Oscar and I all managed to escape it!

The end of the May hasn't been too bad though. I've finally got my running mojo back and have been running three times a week for the last couple of weeks, as a result I've lost 3lbs! We got round to painting the spare room, ready to transform it into our dressing room. We've had another bank holiday, which means an extra day of family time; and I've been shopping for lots of pretty things to brighten up our house and garden.

As I said, it's been a month of ups and downs!

J xx

Earlier this month we went to stay with our friends over the bank holiday weekend. We had a lovely time and the kids were all really well behaved, which is always a bonus!

On the journey home, we realised that Oscar didn't have his beloved Bunny. Bunny is a Jellycat toy, which was actually bought for Heidi about a year ago. Oscar, despite having Baby - a teddy who at the time went everywhere with him - took a real shine to Bunny and ever since has been his comforter. He sleeps with him every night and if he's every worried or scared, Bunny is always in his arms.

At first we didn't panic. We'd recently stopped Oscar taking Bunny out with us, due to the risk of losing him, so we thought it must still be at our friend's house and we'd simply forgotten to pack him. I got in touch with my friend and asked her to have a good search.

We stopped at a service station to check our bags – no Bunny! My friend text me back – she couldn't find him either! Oh no, panic! We obviously didn't tell Oscar this news (it's ok to tell little lies in order to protect our children, right?). We told him that Bunny was at her house and that her little baby, would look after him until he could be posted back. He seemed ok with this. He wasn't 100% happy but there weren't any tears. At least not until bedtime when he cried his little heart out. We finally calmed him down by giving him his old Baby and one of Heidi's bunnies, but he was not happy..!

It was horrid. I was so upset that it appeared Bunny was missing. I rang my friend and asked her to have another look – no joy! I was starting to accept that he was gone. He must've taken him out with us when we'd gone to the park and no one had noticed. I was really bothered that his little friend and comforter was gone. I know it sounds a bit silly, but seeing how upset it made him made my heart break. He loved that Bunny!

We decided the best thing we could do was to order another one and tell (another) lie and say that my friend had given him a good wash. Surely it was worth a try?!

New Bunny arrived on the Thursday. To try and rough him up a bit I stuck him in the wash. Original Bunny was very well worn, so one wash made very little impact!

When Oscar arrived home I presented him with Bunny and my story of why he looked so fluffy and clean. He seemed to buy it – phew! I think at first he wasn't 100% convinced, he didn't seem quite as attached to Bunny as he had been previously, but I think he went with it anyway as it was an easier idea to live with.

This was a few weeks ago now and new Bunny seems to be a firm fixture again. Still, I can't help but wonder what come of original Bunny though, but I'll guess we'll never know…

Has your little one ever lost a favourite toy?

J xx

April has seemed like a short month for us. I suspect that's because we went on holiday for a week at the beginning of the month.

It's also been a great month for us too!

We went to Portugal to celebrate my parents' 50th wedding anniversary and had a great time.

When we returned from holiday, the weather had finally got better and it felt so much more like Spring - hurrah!

I did some baking with the twins for the first time ever. I've wanted to do it for a while as I love baking, but I was a little scared that there would be carnage! However, I'm delighted to report that we all survived - even if the flapjacks did get stuck to the baking paper!

Simon and I ran the Derby 10k, with a group of friends who are also into running. I found the first 5k really hard, as I started off too fast. However, I still managed a new PB of 58mins and 28 seconds.

Oscar, who has been having skiing lessons since January, passed his Level 1 and is now on Level 2. We were so proud of him. It seemed for a while that he just wasn't getting it, but now he appears to have found the knack for it.

We finally managed to sort our back garden out. Last year it got wrecked whilst we had our extension, so we've given it a good clean up, laid some new turf and painted the shed, fence and decking. It looks so much better and I'm looking forward to getting lots of use out of it this year. We just need to add some pretty potted plants to give it some colour. I promise to share once I've added the finishing touches.

One Sunday during April we had a lovely afternoon treat at our local Pizza Hut. For once, we all enjoyed a stress free meal. There was no shouting, crying, moaning or fighting (the pizza was pretty good too)! Hence why I'm including it in my monthly roundup!

This month Oscar had a tooth out. He had really bad tooth ache about 6 months ago and his tooth got infected, so it was decided it needed to come out. One of our friends is a dentist and he's great with kids, so we went to visit him. Oscar was so brave. He had to have two injections to numb his gum as the first didn't work. He didn't even cry once, despite the fact that it clearly hurt him. We made sure he was sufficiently rewarded by the Tooth Fairy, who apparently leaves more, when a dentist has had to take a tooth out! It was awful to see, but I'm glad he won't have anymore pain.

April has also been a good month in terms of my blog. Although I haven't managed to post as often as I'd like, I got invited to my first blog related event - the opening of a beauty salon's new premises. I was allowed to take a friend, so me and my friend Lindsay went along to nkd in Nottingham and enjoyed taster treatments, Prosecco and a lovely goodie bag. As a result of attending I'm now helping the company manage their social media. It's amazing the opportunities that blogging can open up! My blog also went up 92 places in the TOTS100 chart.